Awareness Comes Before Change
When we feel stressed, anxious, or stuck, the instinct is often to change something immediately. We try to think differently. We try to calm down. We try to stop the habit, fix the feeling, or push past the discomfort. But real change doesn’t begin with effort. It begins with awareness. You can’t fix what you don’t see, and more importantly, nothing needs fixing before it’s seen.
Why We Skip Awareness
Most of us were never taught how to be with our inner experience. When uncomfortable thoughts or emotions arise, we learn to:
- distract ourselves
- analyze or judge what’s happening
- push it away
- or label it as something to get rid of
This makes sense. The nervous system is wired to move away from discomfort. Especially when we’ve been under stress for a long time, the body learns that speed and control feel safer than presence.
When we’re stuck in this cycle, even small triggers can feel overwhelming.
So instead of awareness, we jump straight into problem-solving.
And yet, without awareness, we’re trying to change something we don’t fully understand.
Awareness Is Not Analysis
Awareness is often misunderstood.
It’s not:
- figuring out why you feel the way you do
- labeling yourself or your patterns
- mentally watching yourself from a distance
True awareness is much simpler — and much softer. Awareness is:
- noticing what is here
- allowing it to exist
- without needing it to be different
It’s the difference between: “Why am I like this?” and “Oh… this is what’s here right now.”
That shift alone changes everything.
Why Awareness Feels So Powerful
When you bring awareness to a thought, emotion, or habit — without judgment — something interesting happens.
The nervous system begins to relax.
Why?
Because awareness says:
- You are allowed to exist.
- You don’t need to hide.
- You’re not in trouble.
This is especially important for stress and anxiety patterns.
Many anxious patterns are not trying to harm us, they are trying to protect us.
When we meet them with awareness instead of resistance, they no longer need to work so hard.
Observing Without Judgment Creates Space
Judgment collapses us.
Awareness creates space.
When you observe:
- a thought like “This is too much”
- an emotion like tightness or fear
- a habit like checking, avoiding, or overworking without trying to stop it, you step out of identification.
You’re no longer inside the personas and patterns you’ve built.
You’re with it.
And in that space, choice becomes possible.
Not forced choice.
Natural choice.
Awareness Is the Beginning of Change — Not the End Goal
Awareness doesn’t mean you stay stuck.
It means you stop fighting yourself.
Once something is fully seen, gently and honestly, it begins to shift on its own.
Not because you pushed it.
But because it no longer needs to hide.
This is why awareness comes before change.
And why trying to change before awareness often leads to frustration or burnout.
Bringing Awareness Into Daily Life
Awareness doesn’t require long meditations or special conditions. It can be as simple as:
- noticing your breath when you feel rushed
- feeling your feet on the ground when anxiety rises
- pausing to observe a reaction instead of acting on it
Even a few seconds of non-judgmental noticing can interrupt an automatic pattern.
A Gentle Reminder
You don’t need to become more aware by force.
You don’t need to watch yourself perfectly.
You don’t need to “do awareness right.”
Awareness is already here — it’s what’s reading these words.
The invitation is simply to turn toward your experience with curiosity instead of control.
Because once something is seen with compassion, it’s already on its way to change.
🌱 Mini Practice — “The Pause Before Change” (5 minutes)
- Pause - when you notice stress, tension, or reactivity, pause.
- Notice Ask yourself gently: What am I feeling right now? What sensations are in my body? What thoughts are present? No fixing. No judging.
- Name Silently name what you notice: “Tightness.” “Rushing.” “Worry.” “Thinking.” Naming brings space without effort.
- Allow Say quietly to yourself: “This is allowed to be here.”
- Choose From this place of awareness, ask: “What feels supportive right now? It might be: one breath, slowing down slightly, doing nothing at all Awareness comes first. Choice follows naturally.
🪷 Optional journaling prompt:
“What does this feeling remind me of?”
This small pause is where transformation begins.
My Own InnerShift
It’s hard to develop your awareness muscle when your mind is used to taking over. I remember the amount of times I was trying to shift to awareness and my mind would just continue racing.
It gets easier though.
The more I practiced the easier it got.
After a while I started to realise the power I had. The power that I was readily giving away without awareness.
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to >choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
- Victor E. Frankl
A Gentle Next Step
If you see yourself in these words, know this:
Awareness can be guided and taught retroactively. If you didn’t catch the trigger in the moment, you can still catch it later, and learn how to hold space for anything that comes up. This practice will train your awareness muscle and make it easier to do it in real time in the future.
Need help with this practice? I offer a 30-minute free Alignment Call — a gentle, no-pressure session to explore what’s beneath the surface of your restlessness and begin your InnerShift.